silence

When God seems silent....is it because i am not quiet enough?  Am I too busy to hear the "still small voice"?
I want to hear, but I don't.  I want to feel that closeness, but I don't.  WHY   It is not something I can replicate.  I can't make it happen.  I wait, pray, wonder, and wait some more.  Am I so proudful that I think something I might DO will move God?  wow, adjust my attitude.  God is the almighty.  At his beckoning the waves and wind obey.  How is it that I think I might beckon God to show up for me.  No wonder God seems silent.  perhaps he is waiting for me to get a clearer glimps of who he is and who I really am.
My pride has silenced God...He wants nothing to do with it.  Pride creeps in like a spider in the chill of  Autum.  I don't notice it is there until a web is hanging in the corner of my room.  I don't notice my pride until I can no longer hear the sweet voice of my Savior.  Fall cleaning seems inorder.  The cobwebs of pride need to be cleaned.  Replaced by the joy of thanksgiving.  My God is so patient with me.